The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" She comes to the phone after many rings and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "What are you doing in bed at this hour?" "Getting a second opinion!"Ī man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. The husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bedĮither," and storms out of the house. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"Ī doctor and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'" "Yeah?!" she replies. Just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not".Ī husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you otherwise. The wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?Ī: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising lawĪ typical macho man married a typical good-looking lady and, after Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you beganĪ: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? Dennington was dead at the time?Ī: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to? Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?Ī: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition noticeĪ: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. Q: How was your first marriage terminated?Ī: He was about medium height and had a beard. Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he? Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, heĭoesn't know about it until the next morning? Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?Ī: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. Can you give us an example of something that you've Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? Reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were Said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court These are from a book called "Disorder In The Court" and are things people The barman turns to the relevant page: 'Panda: Bear-like mammal native to China. 'Look it up,' says the panda, throwing him a badly punctuated wildlife manual. A panda goes into a bar, orders a sandwich, fires a gun and heads for the door.
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